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Post by biteme on Jan 16, 2014 4:19:21 GMT -5
My 82yr old Aunt was just diagnosed with lung cancer. She has been a smoker for as long as I can remember. I think she is up to smoking 2-3 packs a day. She lives alone and has an aide that comes everyday to help her with daily chores. Her daughter lives about 500 miles away and visits several times a year. Her daughter rides her ass every single time she sees her about quitting smoking. It causes them to fight about it because my Aunt doesnt want to stop. She has been fairly healthy thru the years. She recently got pneumonia and was admitted into the hospital and when they did the xray of her lung they found the cancer. My feeling is she's 82yr old leave her alone!! Why fight over wanting her to quit when she clearly doesnt want too.
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Post by musicman on Jan 16, 2014 6:41:33 GMT -5
My 82yr old Aunt was just diagnosed with lung cancer. She has been a smoker for as long as I can remember. I think she is up to smoking 2-3 packs a day. She lives alone and has an aide that comes everyday to help her with daily chores. Her daughter lives about 500 miles away and visits several times a year. Her daughter rides her ass every single time she sees her about quitting smoking. It causes them to fight about it because my Aunt doesnt want to stop. She has been fairly healthy thru the years. She recently got pneumonia and was admitted into the hospital and when they did the xray of her lung they found the cancer. My feeling is she's 82yr old leave her alone!! Why fight over wanting her to quit when she clearly doesnt want too. I don't disagree with what you said. I hope the daughter can see that all she's doing is making the little time she has left with her mother miserable. Your aunt has lived a long life, and changing that smoking habit now I would suspect is near impossible. I wish your family the best. Cancer, in any form, is a bitch. |
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Post by Deleted on Jan 16, 2014 8:10:32 GMT -5
I agree. At 82, quitting won't make a difference - except to make her unhappy, and maybe shorten the time she has left.
I had an aunt very similar-- everyone begged her to quit- she kept right on smoking until cancer got her. At age 98.
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Post by niamhaine on Jan 16, 2014 8:14:05 GMT -5
It's her mother's life. Why fight in the time she has left?
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Post by Deleted on Jan 16, 2014 8:18:09 GMT -5
If the cancer is operable and the prognosis is good then she should be encouraged to quit and maybe add a few more years to her life. If, however, she's ready to give up and die then let her enjoy her remaining cigarettes.
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Post by davinci on Jan 16, 2014 8:35:46 GMT -5
If the cancer is operable and the prognosis is good then she should be encouraged to quit and maybe add a few more years to her life. If, however, she's ready to give up and die then let her enjoy her remaining cigarettes. Wonder if the e-cig thing might help her. |
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Post by Cowboyz on Jan 16, 2014 8:38:46 GMT -5
I agree with you, why fight over what she clearly doesn't want to change. I do wish your family the best. The daughter should try and make the best of what time she has left with her Mom.
I've lost both of my parents to cancer... it's not easy!
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Post by Evil Yoda on Jan 16, 2014 12:19:23 GMT -5
Her prognosis is going to depend on which specific type of lung cancer she's got, her general otherwise, and... yes... her will to live. Maybe she's done. In such a case let her have her cigarettes. I remember how upset my grandfather got when he was in the hospital for some non lung-related thing and they wouldn't let him smoke. One of my aunts snuck him one and got barred from visiting by his attending! He fought his way though that and lived a few more years (he was in his eighties when he died).
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Post by Evil Yoda on Jan 16, 2014 12:21:10 GMT -5
I've lost both of my parents to cancer... it's not easy! Perhaps you're already doing this, but please make sure your own doctor is aware of this. Certain cancers are hereditary (weakly or strongly), and knowing your history, he may recommend additional wellness testing. Take care. |
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Post by douger on Jan 16, 2014 12:22:52 GMT -5
In an era of health care confusion, how amenable will insurance be to providing expensive life extending procedures to an 82 year old?
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Post by Evil Yoda on Jan 16, 2014 12:46:48 GMT -5
In an era of health care confusion, how amenable will insurance be to providing expensive life extending procedures to an 82 year old? They're legally obligated to provide the coverage they agreed to, but... a common dodge is to declare advanced therapies as "experimental" and refuse to cover them on that basis. Very few insurers will cover experimental therapies. These are therapies that have made it through clinical trials (so they are generally regarded as safe, within the context of their goal, and generally regarded as effective). But they have not, perhaps, received FDA approval or been reviewed by an insurance company. Patients should consider quality of life. Being on chemotherapy is unpleasant, to say the least. For some lung cancer patients it is a lifelong battle (there are drugs that can keep cancer at bay but not actually cure it, which is doubtless how the drug providers like it). If the patient's prognosis is "one year" and with chemo is "eighteen unpleasant months" then the patient has a hard decision to make. (This is an EXAMPLE: most lung cancer patients in otherwise good health have a better prognosis than this.) |
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Post by Cowboyz on Jan 16, 2014 13:04:45 GMT -5
I've lost both of my parents to cancer... it's not easy! Perhaps you're already doing this, but please make sure your own doctor is aware of this. Certain cancers are hereditary (weakly or strongly), and knowing your history, he may recommend additional wellness testing. Take care. Thanks EY... my doctor is aware, very aware. We've had this conversation a few times.
My Mom died from glioblastoma, brain cancer. Almost never hereditary as with my Dad, he died from lung cancer which was caused by smoking. We were told my Mom's was caused from something external but we just don't know what it is.
I was once told that between 5% and 7% of all cancer is inherited. It's a gene that you get from your parent and can present in different forms of cancer. I've never been tested to see if I carry the gene. Not sure I want to.
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Post by Deleted on Jan 16, 2014 14:50:28 GMT -5
In an era of health care confusion, how amenable will insurance be to providing expensive life extending procedures to an 82 year old? I suspect that depends on your premium. |
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Post by Deleted on Jan 16, 2014 14:56:09 GMT -5
I agree with you, why fight over what she clearly doesn't want to change. I do wish your family the best. The daughter should try and make the best of what time she has left with her Mom. I've lost both of my parents to cancer... it's not easy! Cancer sucks. My husband was reading over some notes he took when our 19 year old had cancer at the age of 5. Our son wanted the cancer gone and wanted to know if the doctors were trying to kill him. In this case I say let the aunt make her own choices. |
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Post by Deleted on Jan 16, 2014 14:58:52 GMT -5
In an era of health care confusion, how amenable will insurance be to providing expensive life extending procedures to an 82 year old? I suggest a Q&A with the president and ask him. Of course he is not open to be honest. Sad to say. |
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Post by douger on Jan 16, 2014 15:03:11 GMT -5
In an era of health care confusion, how amenable will insurance be to providing expensive life extending procedures to an 82 year old? I suspect that depends on your premium. I'm not sure that a premium is a valid guide. New policies have both high premiums and deductibles. While they may cover more, how deeply remains to be seen. At any rate, an 82 year old lung cancer patient is most likely a Medicare recipient. |
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Post by Cowboyz on Jan 16, 2014 15:05:29 GMT -5
I agree with you, why fight over what she clearly doesn't want to change. I do wish your family the best. The daughter should try and make the best of what time she has left with her Mom. I've lost both of my parents to cancer... it's not easy! Cancer sucks. My husband was reading over some notes he took when our 19 year old had cancer at the age of 5. Our son wanted the cancer gone and wanted to know if the doctors were trying to kill him. In this case I say let the aunt make her own choices.
That story about your son is heartbreaking, so glad his story has a happy ending!! 
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Post by biteme on Jan 16, 2014 17:41:34 GMT -5
My Aunt probably isn't health enough for a major surgery if one is required. Shes 82 and has frequent falls. She calls her local FD several times a month because she cant get up once she falls. They have a key to get in her house because they are there so often. She has Life Alert. She doesn't want to go into a nursing home.They found something on her brain years ago but I dont remember what it was. I just want her to be as happy and stress free as much as possible in her later years.
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Post by biteme on Jan 16, 2014 17:42:53 GMT -5
I suspect that depends on your premium. I'm not sure that a premium is a valid guide. New policies have both high premiums and deductibles. While they may cover more, how deeply remains to be seen. At any rate, an 82 year old lung cancer patient is most likely a Medicare recipient. She does have Medicare she may also have some low income insurance as a secondary. She lives on $600 a month |
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Post by biteme on Jan 16, 2014 17:47:31 GMT -5
If the cancer is operable and the prognosis is good then she should be encouraged to quit and maybe add a few more years to her life. If, however, she's ready to give up and die then let her enjoy her remaining cigarettes. Wonder if the e-cig thing might help her. Ive wondered the same thing, but I dont want to fight with her over it. She has tried the gum, patch and the medication at her daughters encouragement. One of them made her delusional. She was asleep and woke up to her sister at the door saying you gotta get ready your daughter is almost here we are going to lunch. She got up got dressed waited in her chair for 30 minutes. Then called her daughter and asked where she was. Her daughter said im in the hotel in 1am whats wrong. The sister that told her her daughter was coming has been dead for almost 7 years. |
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Post by Evil Yoda on Jan 16, 2014 18:04:29 GMT -5
Whatever they found on her brain probably wasn't malignant. Most brain malignancies are quite aggressive. There is usually no time for mets to form. There are many benign abnormalities, and some of them don't require treatment. Some of them, treatment would be a poor idea in an older (>70 y.o.) person.
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Post by Evil Yoda on Jan 16, 2014 18:06:09 GMT -5
I suggest a Q&A with the president and ask him. Of course he is not open to be honest. Sad to say. |
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Post by biteme on Jan 17, 2014 15:32:36 GMT -5
I just talked to my Aunt. She had radiation yesterday. Her pneumonia is really bad she can barely breathe. They are giving her breathing treatments but they dont seem to be helping much. Her BP and sugar levels are WAY UP. They said when she goes home she cant be alone. They are talking about nursing home and maybe even Hospice. I tried to hide my tears talking to her on the phone. I hope I was successful. She got permission to have her dog visit her yesterday at the hospital so that helped make her feel a little better
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Post by Evil Yoda on Jan 17, 2014 16:36:30 GMT -5
It sounds like she's in very bad shape. I'm sorry to hear that.
What they mean, of course, is that it is not advisable that she be alone. They can't actually make demands of this nature. It could be that they fear if she goes home alone she will experience some health crisis and die if no one is there to assist here.
I can tell you that if they recommend hospice... when Mom went into one, they treated her beautifully. And, removed from the "care" of doctors, she made a recovery. She had two more years. So I will send you my best wishes for her.
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Post by douger on Jan 17, 2014 17:03:54 GMT -5
I just talked to my Aunt. She had radiation yesterday. Her pneumonia is really bad she can barely breathe. They are giving her breathing treatments but they dont seem to be helping much. Her BP and sugar levels are WAY UP. They said when she goes home she cant be alone. They are talking about nursing home and maybe even Hospice. I tried to hide my tears talking to her on the phone. I hope I was successful. She got permission to have her dog visit her yesterday at the hospital so that helped make her feel a little better My thoughts are with you and your aunt. |
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